September 13, 2010

Monogamy

Can you ever be satisfied by one man or does it take multiple people to fill your needs? This is a question I've been trying to find an answer for. It seems that in a gay relationship monogamy is about as rare as a virgin on prom night. It's funny, I have so many friends in relationships, but there's only a handful of couples that do not "play." Is this a requirement in order to be in a gay relationship? One must "play" well with others!?

Over the weekend I was at a birthday party for my good friend Steve. His husband, Bill threw it for him. They've been together for at least 11 years and when you look at them you can tell they love each other. Steve and Bill are one of those couples that likes to "play." They mostly invite a "third" into the bedroom, but are also known to hook up with people alone as long as the other one knows about it. Most gay relationships work this way it's called an "Open Relationship."

A close friend of mine experienced the playful wrath of Steve over the weekend. Steve grabbed my friend Bobby and dragged him into a room while Steve's boyfriend Bill was entertaining company by the pool. When Steve and Bobby emerged from the dark room, Bobby looked like a deer caught in headlights while Steve looked liked he just ate a Willy Wonka Chocolate Bar. I know for a fact that this behavior "goes down" (haha) every party Steve and Bill throw.

While we were at the party Kevin was flirting with a nice piece of yummy man pie. I observed their behavior (kinda like the discovery Channel) until the man pie's boyfriend came and dragged him away. He then later came back over to Kevin and tried to pick up where they left off. Kevin said to him, "Don't you have a boyfriend?" Man pie responded with, "Yeah, so?" This party reassured my theory that monogamy is quickly becoming an endangered species. Even though Kevin is known to hook up with random guys and "straight" guys even he felt like this was wrong.

Someone once told me that his open relationship was the best of both worlds. He could have sex with as many twinks as he liked and then come home to his best friend, where he felt emotionally safe and connected. Open relationships must work for some people. Most of my couple friends who have this kind of deal have been together for a long time. When all is said and done though it's not for me. I refuse to share my toys with anyone else! This Cinderella is waiting for "her" Prince Charming who wants a monogamist relationship.