February 17, 2011

Sex & The City Of Brotherly Love Part 1

He started to caress my shoulders and my chest. He kissed me deeply and rough. Cut to me; laying naked flat on my back in a compromising position! How did I get like this? What was gonna happen next you ask? Well it all started on Saturday night. Bobby and his friend Tina (Xtina!) planned to celebrate his 24th birthday party in Philadelphia. Bobby invited Kevin and I, (Of course what's a party without us!) with two other girls Krissy and this chick we call Glen Coco. "You go Glen Coco!"

Tina's family has a limo company so she hooked us up with a limo. The limo was a great idea we'd all meet at Bobby's house and leave from there and the hour or so drive down was perfect to pre-game in the limo! I of course told my Philly peeps that I'd be in the city. So Knockers, Enrique and Edward were gonna meet us out. Once Edward heard that we were gonna be in the city he asked me if I would stay for a few days with him. (He's been having boy issues.) With the help of my friends I was able to pull it off. Kevin picked me up from home and drove me to Bobby's house. (He owed me for all the times I carted his drunken hot mess ass home!) So the plan was set in motion; Take the limo down to Philly meet up with Edward and stay with him till Wednesday, then take a train or bus home.

The limo ride was fun. Our driver's name was Carl and we affectionately called him, "Hot Carl!" (You know what a 'Hot Carl' is don't you? And yeah we talked about it in the limo.) We did lime green tequila jello shots, (Margarita shots) I drank the white wine and Vodka with Ginger Ale that I put in water bottles (I know keeping it classy!) and we snacked on Taco Dip (not pink taco) that Krissy made. Glen Coco talked about her open marriage with Kevin. I'm pretty sure she wanted to fuck him with a strap-on on! Little does she know she'd have to call a deforestation company because that ass is hairier than your mama's menopausal mustache! She said, "I love you Kevin and would love if you gave my husband head!" Again I say where on earth do we find this people and why do they love us so much!!?? Just when you thought it couldn't get any crazier, Bobby had told me before we went out that Krissy liked to bring a "celebrity" along. What she does, is she prints a picture out of a celebrity, puts it on a stick and carries them in her purse! She makes people take pictures with them, introduces them to strangers and etc! I must admit it's a good ice breaker. So who was the celebrity tucked away in her purse? Douglas Emerson whom was best known as the character Scott Scanlon from the original 90210. Scott was the blonde haired kid that accidentally shot himself in the second season. So Krissy had Scott on a stick with a gun!

When we got into the city we hit Woody's first. It had a decent crowd my friend Enrique met us there. Enrique and I go way back he used to be my ex Richard's roommate when he lived in Easton. Enrique and I have kept in touch since Richard and I broke up. He is a nice person I've always gotten along with him. I practically lived with him! He always seemed to have to pee every time I got out of the shower though haha. He always caught me in a towel and I think one time he did walk in on Richard and I having sex in the shower. It was so good to see him and I'll always stay in touch with him.
Knockers showed up shortly after I ran into Enrique. He of course looked fierce as always. I bought us Grey Goose on the rocks which is our standard drink. It of course is what keeps us looking so young and beautiful. I think the vodka must kill all the toxins in our system! After some private viewings of naughty pics and video on Knockers phone (yes he kinda sexted me last week. Nice submarine!) all of us headed off to Tavern On Camac.

The Tavern I barely remember. Things got a little fuzzy. Knockers said we walked in and all eyes were on him (he knows a lot of people) he said his usual hellos to his adoring fans. (Old guys that want some booty) Stopped and smiled for a few pictures, (Of course again we don't have a picture taken together. This keeps happening.) then we b-lined it to the bar. It was funny I do slightly remember saying I felt like I was with a celebrity. Knockers said, "It's all in a weekends work!" He then said he bought me a Grey Goose and Sprite. Which I don't remember at all! Knockers said we went to dance then when he turned around, POOF I was gone! He had no idea where I went. (I feel bad I didn't say goodbye, but totally will make it up to him next time. Like slob on knob, L his Bs or something.) I guess my carriage was turning back into a pumpkin. I think Kevin or Bobby must have seen me and dragged me away. Neither of them really remembers either, but that's the only way someone would have be able to get me away from Knockers. Apparently we went to the pizza shop (I still don't remember this) and after that I was dropped off outside Edwards apartment. I do remember waiting for him on the street. He said I was walking like a Mummy that had been fucked by the Crypt Keeper! I guess my leg was bothering me. Edward said I kept smacking him. I tend to do this sometimes when I'm drunk. Kevin says that's how he knows I've had too much I start smacking him. When I drink too much and Bobby is around I tend to umm grab his junk. He has good stuff down there. I do different things with different people. Outside Edward's place I also made some loud comments to the people that were standing outside the bar. He said it was lucky we were not shot by the ghetto folk. Time for bed! End scene!

I hope my Bobby Bunny had a fabulous birthday in Philly, (he certainly looked mantastic!) I sure had a great time from what I remember! Oh to be 24 again! My biggest concern back then was which slutty outfit to wear!? Chaps or see a through shirt?? Not much has changed my concerns now are what to wear, but the chaps and see through shirts are retired! That 'Night At The Roxbury' look is so out!

So what happened next you ask? What happened during my visit with Edward?? To be continued...