April 19, 2011
Another Year Gayer
My birthday started out somewhat depressing with Edward leaving for Atlanta. His text messages were sweet but were bringing me a little down. I told him to stop being sad because I didn't want to be a Debbie Downer on my birthday. Kevin had some birthday plans for me. Earlier in the day he got us tickets to see the midnight showing of Scream 4. We both love a good slasher film and what compliments a good horror movie, alcohol of course! Before the movie we went around to a couple places in the Promenade Shops to get our drink on. I realized something that night. Apparently it looks like Kevin can't walk in revolving doors. Our first place we went to had one of those spinning revolving doors. Kevin was in front of me and looked at it very puzzled and frightened he said, "Omg! I hate these things. How do you do them?" I of course laughing my ass said, "You go in the opening, push on the bar and walk." Kevin who has issues chewing gum and walking at the same time discovered this to be quite challenging. His first attempt at this revolving door was hilarious because as he went in and started walking, he was so focused, he almost forget to get out! When we sat down at the bar he looked at me and said, "That was hard!" (Haha!!!!) After our fabulous martinis we left. This time I went first and Kevin hopped in behind me, (He wanted me to work the revolving door this time.) but alas he still had difficulties! As I got out he turned the wrong way and banged into the side of the door. In the gayest voice possible he said, "Ouch!" Now you know why I love hanging out with him so much. He is guaranteed to do something ridiculous. We walked to the next bar and as we approached it, Kevin stopped. His arch nemesis the 'revolving door' was here as well. He looked at me and said, "I'm scared I hate these things." I of course busted out laughing. He did much better with this door than with the previous one. This calls for a round of applause!
James and Sean gave me hilarious Birthday cards. I recorded the sound they made. The first is two old ladies cat calling at a sexy construction worker, which is totally going to be James and I.
After a couple drinks, ok 4 (Bobby was drunk after 2 drinks) we all headed to the Stonewall to celebrate with more peeps. When we got to the bar James bought me a cosmo. (Standard Homo drink) Bobby wasn't sure what to order. He wanted a margarita but since he was drinking vodka before he was afraid to get tequila. So what was his solution? When I asked him what he was drinking he smiled at me and said, "A Peach Long Island!" Um he should have just gotten the margarita those Peach Long Islands are all alcohol! Drunk Bobby! Some more friends showed up at the bar Kile, Lola, and Sam. Like a hemorrhoid that never goes away, Hick was there as well. He bought me a drink and a shot. I played nice. Hey it's free alcohol! Hick and Peppy have a little complicated history and Hick told James that "Peppy is one of my top 5 best bottoms." Seriously, who says that? Could he be anymore of a cocky asshole? I just don't get it. I don't get how he ends up with all these cute guys like Andy and Peppy. He looks like he has been working for Old McDonald's farm! "Old Macdonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O And on his farm he had a pig (Hick), E-I-E-I-O With a (snort) here and a (snort) there, Here a (snort) there a (snort), Everywhere a (snort-snort) Old Macdonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O" The end of the night is a little fuzzy for me. I don't remember much after the bar. I pigged out on McDonalds, and smacked Bobby and Kevin around. I tended to playfully smack people when I'm really really drunk. Kinda like when you horse around with a little brother. I gotta learn to stop though I know it has to be annoying to everyone involved. My bad. I had a great Friday night with my boys. I'm really lucky to have this circle of friends.
Saturday Bobby planned to take me to Philadelphia to celebrate in the Gayborhood and meet up with my Knockers boo. Unfortunately Mother Nature was against us going. I thought things were looking up when the rain stopped on our way down to Philly, but we ended up getting into a huge traffic jam. We were stuck in this traffic jam from 10:10pm till after 1:30am! I heard rumors of flooding and Bobby looked at his iPhone app and it said an accident. Whatever it was, it was serious! There were people driving on the shoulder of the road, people backing up to try to reach the previous exit, (Which was almost a mile away.) a bachelorette party bus, (With guys humping each other and girls screaming) cars running out of gas from sitting so long, people sleeping in their cars on the shoulder, ghetto ladies whipping their weaves pretending they are Jennifer Hudson and other gay boys trying to reach the city. It was absolutely crazy I've never been in traffic like that before. (4 lanes trying to get off on a 1 lane exit!) It gotten to the point where I was so bored that if Bobby would have been my boyfriend he would have gotten roadhead or a handjob.
Sunday my girl Maria took me out for sushi and sake. I haven't seen her in almost a year so it was nice to catch up. She is still that filthy gorgeous girl. I swear every time I see her our very first conversation is always about her bowel moments or lack of. After some sake we were like two chatty school girls. We ate enough sushi to feed like 4 people. I needed a funday Sunday after that sucky Saturday.
So now that my birthday celebration has come to an end I can't help but feel I need to make some life changes. I'm not happy where I am at 32 and I want to change that. I'm another year older and I swear gayer. Hopefully things get better.