I've been a victim to rumors all my life. They first started in school. You know the typical rumor "Oh my god is he gay?" Of course that rumor ended up being true, but back then this chubby little Ginger (I was an over weight kid) had no idea really. I just knew I was different, not that I was a boloney pony rider. After I was completely out and thrusted (pun intended) into the gay world I discovered what catty bitchy queens most homos are. In my early 20's I used to go-go dance at this gay bar (Never stripped completely naked it was just down to my underwear) and people always assumed I was this big whore because of it. Guys used to automatically try to make advances towards me, instead of getting to know me. The truth is though that I was still a virgin at that time. My cherry wasn't popped till after I had quit the go-go dancing. Certain boys loved to call me a slut back then because of how I dressed and that I danced in front of men for tips. The reason why I did it was because I liked the attention. (duh) I spent my teen years feeling like a social outcast and when I finally discovered who I was, it was freeing. Finally was comfortable in my own skin, so I showed it.
Rumors have affected some relationships too. I've seen couples break up over gossip. I've seen fights started. With my ex fiancé Richard there was always some sort of rumor attached to our relationship. Some of them were true actually and I wish that I hadn't been so blinded by love. No one wants to admit that someone they care for is doing things behind their back. I think that was my problem. I was so focused on his good side that I refused to believe that he had a shady bad side. All those rumors I used to hear of Richard's shady behavior or that he was cheating on me turned out to actually be real. A part of me did believe them that's why we always got into fights, but I had a hard time admitting the rumors could be true. It didn't help that Richard always turned things around to make it sound like I was at fault or I was just plain stupid. (He was very verbally abusive at times.) Richard had this whole spiel of how everyone was just jealous of our relationship and they are trying to break us up yadda, yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah he was a lying sack of shit. I wish I could tie him up and have pitbulls gnaw at his junk or put honey on his ass and make him sit on a mound of fire ants! Words can't describe how I truly despise this low life.
So if you're in a relationship how do you deal with negative rumors? Well first, always listen and pay attention to what's going on with your partner. Is he acting strange? If it's the first time you've ever heard this gossip most likely it's not 100% true, (Don't give haters the satisfaction of creating waves.) ask him about it and see how he reacts. (If he gets really angry to me that would be a red flag) Most likely if you keep hearing the same rumor or similar rumor there may be some truth behind it. Especially if there's more than one gossip queen telling you about it. With Richard I refused to listen to the signs which were right in front of my face, don't be blinded by love or a pretty face.
Unlike Kevin's putting it out there behavior Bobby is more low key. Rumors though that Bobby is all innocent and shy are completely false. (He's only shy to a point.) Just this week he asked on Twitter if there's an easy way to remove a hickey! When I saw him Saturday it was barely there on his neck. Bobby is what I'd like to call a "Down Low Ho." Hmm how can I put this in the least none piggish way possible? He won't let anything go near any orifice, but is ok giving a helping hand. The truth is Bobby goes on more dates then Kevin and I combined. He has the sweet none threatening appeal which attracts an initial date. Unfortunately he tends to attract guys that just want to hook up so usually there's no second date.
No matter what you do especially if you're in a small gay community people are gonna talk. Hey I write about this stuff. If there wasn't any gossip what the heck would this blog be about in the first place? Just keep a look out for those catty bitches and if you know for a fact that a rumor isn't true, kill it in it's tracks. Don't believe everything you hear right away after all it could just be that 'Whisper Down Alley' thing. "He slept with so and so" could just be "He fell asleep in his bed." "He has crabs" could really be "He ate crabs." (Not sure if I'd risk that one, enter at your own risk.) If rumors are being spread about you and you know who started them, just remember it's ok to slap a bitch.