July 19, 2011

Otters & Cubs & Bears Oh My!

The gay culture always seems as if they need to classify every type of male there is. From Twinks to Daddies there seems to be a category for almost every gay or bi man. One could almost ask "Why can't we just be men who are attracted to other men? Why do we have to be labeled?" But even the so called 'normal' people have to label and define absolutely everything. That's just the way it is. Labels are for soup cans not for people, but still the gay community has to define an individual or action. I think it's our effort to be more like the 'normal' people since that's what they do. One gay subculture that has a popular following and perhaps the most recognizable within the gay lifestyle is Bears.

Kevin and I ventured out to Rainbow Mountain Resort this past Saturday. As we road up the mountain in my car Kevin said, "Wow it is cooler up here. It must be because we are closer to the moon." I just looked at him and laughed hysterically. There was no words that could form to express the duhness I just heard. At last we arrived and It just so happened to be 'Bears And Chub Weekend.' The land of the hairy and chubby. This was bound to be an interesting experience considering I don't fit into the 'Bear' lifestyle and I'm not chubby, but I decided to humor it. Hey I'll try anything once and some hairy men are sexy!

So what is a Bear anyways? This isn't like Yogi and Boo Boo stealing pic-a-nic baskets. A gay Bear is looking for another type of basket. A Bear is actually a LGBT slang term. It refers to men that are homosexual and bisexual and it describes their physical body or hair appearance. Bears have hairy bodies and usually have facial hair. Most times they are heavy-set or muscular. They exude a rugged masculine aura with their grooming and behavior. Bears have this hypermasculine persona and usually only associate themselves with like minded (or guys that have the same appearance) individuals. They are the manly men of our gay world and for some are viewed as hairy gay gods. The fur lovers love to worship them. It's a fetish.
As the gay Bear community has become increasingly popular there was need for it to be subdivided into degree of hairiness or manliness. So the need for different slang terms erupted like hard a cock. Here's some of the Bear terms and related terminology.
Bears- Typically used to described heavier set overly hairy men. They often could have very large muscle body mass and may be muscular (Musclebears) or stockier (Chubbybears) in stature. Some bears have a leather or latex fetish and call themselves Leatherbears. The term bear is used to describe a hairy masculine dominant (top) male figure within a gay relationship as well.
Cub - A Cub of course is a younger (or appearance of being younger looking) version of a Bear. Usually where you find a Bear a Cub is not far behind. They usually have a smaller frame and tend to not be as big as their Bear counterpart or as aggressive. The Cub can be just as hairy as a Bear, but sometimes not hairy at all! The term Cub is used to imply the passive partner (Bottom) of a gay relationship with a Bear.
Otter- An Otter is typically a younger man, but could actually be a guy of any age who is hairy and fits the body type. Otters are not large and usually thinner. They could have a very lean build or no muscle tone at all. An Otter could actually be as hairy as a bear. The best way to describe an Otter is if you took a skinny Twink, covered him in honey, and made him roll around on the floor of a barbershop! Kevin is actually an Otter. He is a fury little beast.
Daddybear - Older Bear. This kind of Bear is looking for a daddy/son role play type relationship. They usually want this relationship with a much younger man either Cub or Twink. Daddybears are very dominant and like to ordain themselves in leather and fetish clothing.

Wolf - A Wolf is a term for a Musclebear. If Andy let all his hair grow out instead of manscaping he could be considered a Bear or a Wolf. His muscular frame is too big to be called an Otter or a Cub. I've also heard this term as reference to an older muscular Bear who is an outdoorsy or biker type.

  Polar Bear - This isn't your Coca~Cola lovable polar bear, but maybe if you're lucky his cock is as thick as a Coke can! Polar Bears are older Bears that have silver or white hair all over. They are the Silver Foxes of the Bear community.

Panda Bear - "Me fury and love you long time. Me sucky sucky on your bamboo sprout. I love cum of sum yung hung gui!" Panda Bears of course are hairy Asian men.

Bear Run - Is a gathering or circuit party for Bear types and their admirers. More gay men are identifying themselves as Bears now so more gay bars have become Bear-friendly. Some bars cater specifically to Bear patrons such as leather or western-style bars and usually have specialized events for them.

Chaser - Is usually short for "chubby chaser," which is a man whom likes overweight men and pursues them. A Chaser can also be used to describe a bear admirer since some Bears tend to be bigger or "chubbier" in size. They are also known as "Trappers" as in "bear trap." Trappers are guys attracted to and pursue Bears or other woodland creatures mentioned.

Chub – A Chub is a heavy set gay man. Usually very stocky or quite large. He may or may not be a Bear. Most times where you find Bears you find Chubs. A lot of events for Bears are also for Chubs as well.
Goldilocks - Is a Bear's Fag Hag. She is often heterosexual, who loves to frolic with her fury friends. "Who's been eating my porridge and eaten it all up?" cried Baby Bear. It's that bitch Goldilocks!

Grizzly Adams - Has two meanings he is a man who is hairy and is attracted to Bears, but doesn't feel he actually is a Bear, or any other subdivision. He could also be a straight hairy man that loves to hang out with Bears. He could be considered the Bear's Fag Stag.

Woof - Being "woofed" at is a compliment. It's a greeting used to express physical attraction towards someone you find sexy. I remember the first time Andy was "woofed" at he ask me "Boo why they making that dog noise at me? Are they calling me a dog? They think I'm ugly?" I laughed at him and when I told him what it meant all he did was smile and turn red.

Otters and Cubs and Bears oh my! I should have brought my ruby slippers "There's no place like the mall, there's no place like the mall, there's no place like the mall." That's exactly what I was thinking as Kevin and I were sitting at the bar watching a Bear walk around in his jockstrap. He wasn't hot. The crowd at Rainbow Mountain was very mixed. Some Bears, Cubs, Otters, Chubs, Twinks, and some regular mo's. There was a few guys I have no idea where they would fit in. Guys with long beards like ZZ Top and a Willie Nelson look-a-like! They were offering a free drink if you showed your fur so some Bears were shirtless and probably shouldn't have been! BUT at least they had the confidence to put it out there and besides it still looked like they were wearing a sweater vest anyways.

  When I went to the bathroom a Bear tried to pick Kevin up. He casually bumped into him to make it look like an accident. (yeah right!) He knew exactly what he was doing. He waited to approach Kevin till I was in the Bathroom. When I came back we chatted with him for a bit, he was obviously drunk and a little cute till he turned around and we realized he was wearing a dead wookiee on his back! You could have combed his body hair. Upon further observation we realized he kind of resembled our ex-boss it was rather weird.

While Kevin and I were playing forest ranger Bobby was in Philly with some other friends. He didn't run into any Bears but he did find a Chipmunk trying to get his nuts. He called me at 4 am to tell me that his squeaky enemy (see post The Deal Breakers) ended up being in the city as well and pulled a surprise attack on him. 

The Chipmunk made out with Bobby. He totally grabbed him and planted one right on him. Bobby said "You know I kinda liked it!" You know what they say Bobby is essentially the little girl in kindergarten and Chip is the bully that pulled on his pigtails, but secretly likes him. So the Chipmunk's bitchy behavior towards Bobby could be his way of saying "I wanna play with your nuts." Bobby said after the short make out session Chip scurried off somewhere. I suggest Bobby gets a rabies shot and some rodent poison.

  Kevin and I had fun with the woodland creatures, but I did not find my Winnie The Pooh Bear. I have his honey in my pot and I'm still waiting. So what's my body hair preference? Well I like alittle something to play with as long as it's in check. Well maintained body hair is sexy, but back hair and unruly body hair is not. A little manscaping never hurt anyone. I don't want any hairballs stuck in my throat. It's nice to snuggle up to your man and play with his chest hair. It just sucks when you get cum in it.